Hello Blog!

So, starting a blog seems like a good thing to do. Something to occupy my time over the next few months, somewhere to put my thoughts. It may never be seen by anyone apart from myself, it may just be my online diary, but it can’t hurt to try, can it?

My name is Jess. I am 25. I am 37 weeks pregnant with my third child. I am married to a perfect man. Perfect in every way aside from one. He died 25 weeks and 2 days ago.

I am a Widow.

A 25 year old, pregnant, Widow.

I will introduce the family, and not get down to the nitty gritty just yet. That can wait!

George's first day!
George’s first day!

I live in Lancashire, with my two wonderful little boys – Toby (4) and George (2). The baby who is currently managing to burrow into my pelvis and bend my ribs at the same time, is another boy! He is called ‘Button’ at the moment. I like rainbows and am fond of cheese on toast. I am in the process of having driving lessons, and have my test a week before Button is due. I consider myself a normal person, although my friends may disagree.

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My Husband is called Jason. That’s right, IS. He is still my Husband, still my children’s Daddy. Still perfectly wonderful and a massive part of our lives. He was 24 when he died. We had been married for 17 months and 22 days. He went to work the morning of 28th August 2014, and never came home. I spoke to him at 3.01pm. He was electrocuted at 4.31pm. He was pronounced dead at 5.21pm. I got a knock on the door at 9.01pm.

Our lives changed forever.

Things haven’t been plain sailing, but, we are ok. We cope. We get on with things. We laugh. We cry. We are still a family. We have a new normal.

We miss him.

I’ll be back soon to start at the very beginning, a very good place to start! (If you sang that, you can be my friend).

Love you Jason xxxxx

5 thoughts on “Hello Blog!

  1. this is so touching and beautiful. So sad and so beautiful at the same time. You are so strong. I sang your last line in my head and as such felt I needed to comment. I hope that’s ok x

  2. Yep, I totally sang that last line. I’ve just read all of your posts – will go back and comment on each – and you have a beautiful writing style. Apart from that, I have sat here with tears flowing down my face, and anger and sadness at your loss. You come across as an amazingly strong woman, I wish you many memories of your wonderful Jason to always be with you and your boys and your Button. xx

  3. I’ve just read through all your posts. I started at the top and worked my way down.

    It’s just fucked up isn’t it? My heart goes out to you and if I lived closer I’d be volunteering to be your doula. But I’m in Scotland.

    Sending much love from someone you don’t even know.

  4. Ever so slightly too far, yes! I did look into getting a doula actually, but my closest is 45 minutes away, and it seems I have got quite good at the ‘winging it’ option, so I am just going to go with what happens on the day! Thank you Karen x

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