An open letter to my Mother.
Thank you.
Not for being an incredible mother, but for your incredible failings, that have made me the woman I am proud to be today.
Because of the complete lack of love and affection you showed to me as a child, I ensure that my children know they are loved beyond measure, every minute of every day. I hug them because you didn’t hug me.
Because of your constant bullying and put downs, I make sure that my children know just how awesome they are. I tell them how talented, clever and hilarious they are, so that they don’t grow up with the same insecurities as me. They are confident because I wasn’t.
Because of your control and manipulation, I give my children a voice. I let them make choices and encourage them to make judgements for themselves. They are free thinkers, because I was not allowed a mind of my own.
Because of your countless explosive outbursts, many of which left scars both physical and mental, I try to be a gentle parent to my children. My boys aren’t scared of me, because I was terrified of you.
You are toxic, and I don’t regret for one moment, my decision to cut all contact with you shortly after Toby was born.
My children will never have to suffer your poison.
I have broken the cycle.
Because of you, I know exactly what kind of Mother I want to be.
Thank you.
To Widowhood and Beyond 